If you don't want Obama, send him to the land down under

I’m not into politics. The reason being, to me all politicians are the same. No matter what they promise during their electoral campaign, you can bet your sweet bippy whoever gets elected will let down the nation.

I mean, what an insult to our intelligence to think we, the people of ANY country in the world, are stupid enough to believe a politician’s empty promises during an electoral campaign. C’mon, people! We all know a politician will sell their grandmother to the devil if it means they’ll get a few extra votes. And they’ll even throw in grandpa and the family pet if it means even more votes!

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Now, I don’t know about my esteemed American friends (of whom I have many), but I have to smirk cynically when I see the big shows some of these political campaigners put on in order to become President of the good US of A. These shows rival anything Hollywood can come up with as far as I’m concerned. In fact, I think the Academy of Motion Pictures and Sciences (AMPAS) should introduce a new category to the Academy Awards--Best charade for good politician—and the Oscar goes to... Well, whoever puts on the best charade for being a good politician, who will keep all his/her promises to the population.

One good thing about all this is at least my Yankee friends get something in return for their vote—good entertainment. Not only this, but I believe voting in the US is not compulsory. God, you guys have it good! In Australia, we are FORCED to vote, and if we don’t we have to pay a fine. Grrrr...

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So you see, this becomes a real dilemma for someone like me who doesn’t give a rat’s ass as to who wins because I know whoever becomes Prime Minister of Australia will be yet another wally (Australian slang for expressing the word “idiot” but in a polite way) with a bad case of megalomania and being a legend in their own lunchtime.

This finally brings me to the subject of my blog post—which is, if Americans don’t want their president, they should send him to the land down under. And make it quick, please. Our federal election kicks off on 7 September, and God help us— the candidate choices, like so many in the past, are akin to scraping the bottom of the barrel.

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Now, ladies and gay gentlemen, please wipe the drool rolling down your chin. The babe pictured to the right is unfortunately NOT  a political candidate. If he were, we wouldn't give a donkey's B-hind if he kept his promises or not. With looks like his, who cares, right?

So why, you might ask, do I think Obama should govern our banana republic? Well, for one, what more damage can he do than our own politicians, who can’t even recognise a good suit unless they’re being taken to court for abusing each other on TV? Oh, I’m referring to the cheap-looking suits they tend to wear. Ar, ar.

The second reason, AND the most important of them all, is this one: If all politicians are the same—full of empty promises—then why put up with one who could be typecast in a Hollywood movie to play a priest about to conduct an exorcism or one who’d make an excellent model for the sculpture of a garden gnome?

In conclusion, all things being equal, I’ll take Obama any day of the week and twice on Sunday. I mean, at least the guy is a cool dude, and as far as I’m concerned, rather sexy. Put it this way, I wouldn’t mind taking a ride on Air Force One with him ;)

So come election day, I will look up into the skies to watch out for Air Force One bearing our new, good-looking, cool dude Prime Minister, Obama. After all, good looks work well in Hollywood, so why not in politics?

I give you one guess as to the cool dude I'd vote for :)

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