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AUTHOR SYLVIA MASSARA

Is it better to have loved and lost?

9/3/2011

4 Comments

 
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They say that it's better to have loved and lost than not to have loved at all. Hmm. Let's examine this further.

I think we can all agree that when we first find love (no matter  how misguided or blind we are) we feel like our little friend "Super Kitty". We are faster than a speeding bullet, can leap tall buildings in a single bound; we fly through space and everything looks absolutely "f....ckng" fantastic; that is, until we crash! This is when it turns out that the object of our affection has feet of clay. In fact, it would be nice if the object of my affection had cement shoes instead (but that's another story and something for The Godfather to work out).

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So, after the devastation of a breakup and the death of our dreams, we are left feeling a little bit like our friend, The Pink Panther. Oh, just shoot me! And we start asking all sorts of questions: "What did I do?" (This is a typical one asked, mainly by females. I mean, why should it be our  fault all the time?). "Why did he/she leave?" And some of us get the good old: "It's not you, it's me" bullshit.

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Okay, so the answer to the question: "Is it better to have loved and lost than not to have loved at all?"

 The answer: I DON'T FREAKIN' KNOW!!!

And you thought I was going to say something really philosophical, right? Sorry to disappoint you.
 
All I can say is that while the first phase of love can be as exhilarating as
landing a 747 airplane on your own while being guided by "ground control", and have Bruce Willis in the back of the plane shooting all the bad guys; having your heart broken is like crashing the bloody plane and killing everyone onboard--including Bruce Willis!

Is there a payoff to putting yourself through all this, only to come out bruised and absolutely crushed with disappointment at the other end? Ask the Dalai Lama.

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There is only one thing I am sure about, and it is this; having gone through some harrowing experiences with the opposite sex, I've learned the following:

*If you’re an author, your writing suddenly gains more depth.

*If you’re a woman over 40, you have a higher chance of being killed by a terrorist than finding a real man.

 *You get sick of people telling you that “what goes around comes around”. This means to me that I must’ve done something really terrible in a previous life (or even this one) in order to deserve meeting those #%&@#@ good-for-nothing SOBs. 

*Life’s a bitch and then you die :-(

*“Eat, Pray, Love”. I tried eating and got indigestion; I prayed, but this didn't change any of the psychos out there; I didn’t find anyone to love yet, but then, I'm not Julia Roberts; however, ... I AM STILL COOL!

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4 Comments
Darcia Helle link
9/4/2011 17:45:47

Sylvia, your coolness factor is off the charts! I don't know the answer to your question, either. I loved and lost a few times along my bumpy path. (It should be loved and got trampled, instead of loved and lost!) I think most of us have been there to some degree. Even the people who love us and stay occasionally break our hearts.

Is it worth it? Hell if I know. But the alternative, never loving at all, is bleak. So I guess I'd have to say yes, it is worth it.

Of course, that doesn't mean you can't order those cement shoes!

Reply
Sylvia Massara link
9/5/2011 06:59:21

Oh Darcia, I can always count on you to make me feel better. I WILL order the cement shoes. Hehehehe. Trust this suggestion to come from a mystery writer :-) And remember, you promised to kill him off for me in one of your novels.

I hear what you say, and I agree. Opening ourselves to love leaves us vulnerable, but at least we have the guts to do it--not like "psycho boy" (my ex). Heaven forbid that he should feel any other emotion except for greed.

Cheers, Sylvia (And yes, I'm super cool!) LOL

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Joanne Clancy link
10/31/2011 18:08:04

I think it is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all, but it sure isn't easy to lose. I've lost a few times and endured the horrendous heartbreak that follows, but like you said Sylvia, it makes for great writing afterwards :-)

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Sylvia Massara link
11/1/2011 01:53:28

Hi Joanne,

I, too, have loved and lost a few times, but the latest one is the worst. He turned out to be a real psycho whose avaricious behaviour has no limits! Long story, and I won't bore you with it, but I hope that there is justice in this world, after all.

We are stronger as writers now, that's for sure! :-)

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